It is friday morning, and there is a bird stuck in my net.

My apartment building has AC units on the outside of every unit, and following what I can only assume to be a constant barrage of various pigeons and doves choosing to make said units their nests, large nets were installed to stop the birds from getting to the AC units. However, as anyone who’s had any passing experience with birds will know, these creatures will stop at nothing to enter spaces they shouldn’t be in.

As of this morning, one of them has managed to infiltrate a hole in my upstairs’ neighbors’ net, and is now stuck on the top of my net.

Somehow, this majestic creature has managed to get its right wing stuck in such a way it cannot pull up nor down to unlodge itself free, as the bottom of the wing, and the very top, have both crossed the net. This creature, upside down, stares at me as I am holding a basket of laundry.

“…I’m sure it’ll figure out how to get out of this mess on its own.”

It is now 13:30, about 5 hours later, and the bird is still stuck in the exact same place. Well, shit, I’m gonna need to do something about this myself.

I go to the upstairs’ neighbors first, and ask them if they can dislodge the bird themselves. They proceed to show me how the net is so large, they can’t even see the poor pigeon hidden behind their AC unit. They suggest I call the city vet hotline, but they’re closed on weekends.

“If I don’t want this bird to die here, I’ll need to do it myself.”

I pick up a broom, and try to move the net so the bird has an easier time escaping. Doesn’t do much.

I get as close as I can to the bird without falling out the window and start trying to dislodge it with my hands. It’s hard, I feel like I’m going to tip over any minute, but after some struggle I manage to remove its right wing. However, majestic a creature as it is, it managed to get its other wing stuck while trying to escape. It’s significantly worse than the first wing was, and I can’t get it out without seriously hurting the bird.

I grab some scissors.

I make a hole near the bird (I do not trust myself to cut the hole its got its wing stuck in), and it rolls over and falls free, right next to my AC unit.

I can’t see the bird anymore.

I sat down to type this post, and decided to go look at the poor thing once more. I can see it now! It’s wobbling next to the net. It’s still alive, but I imagine its wings hurt.

I try to think of how I can get it up and outside, as it’s about two meters from my window to the bottom of the net. I have a broom that’s wide enough at the bottom that I imagine it could comfortably stand on, and I could comfortably raise. The bird stands confused as I poke it several times with the business-end of a broom.

There’s a final project I have open in the other monitor that glares at me as I keep thinking of different ways to rescue the flightless creature.

Any suggestions would be very sincerely appreciated.